my.escape

miércoles, agosto 31, 2005

[ 995. Pre-Birthday Purples ]

Ok, i'm not exactly feeling blue, nor am i feeling fiery with energy, but somewhere in between. I'm physically drained, coupled with nearly-blistered fingers from all the plugging in and out of those darned cables today at 113. Whoever was the smart as who designed those unforgiving grooves on those cables should be placed under a curse by past, present and signallers to come. That's besides the point. With a whole lot of sleep debt, insomnia and terrible sleeping conditions of the bunk, the late morning today was really a fantastic welcome. The power burst only last a short while, from what i saw. It's not even ten yet, and i'm already struggling to keep myself awake and typing this whole chunk. Not to mention, buying breakfast for lionel and calvin before heading back east for more cable plugging. Urgh.

It's three days to my birthday and i'm ain't feeling any excitement.

hello, excitement, come knock on my door. I'll welcome you anytime.

Anyone wants to ask me out? I'd be glad to oblige. Whee! (For the record, i'm booked on friday night, saturday afternoon till night, and sunday afternoon till night.) And if anyone wish to send me cards... (muahahah... so bhb..) just drop me an sms and i'll gladly give you my address. =)

That's it for my narcissistic bit.

Anyway, i've promised to 'grow up' after my 20th birthday and stop being so narcissistic and attention-seeking.

(hear lots of skeptical laughter.)

Ok, maybe not promise. But i'll try.

(hmmm...)

Ok, i shan't even try. Forget that i even said that.

(LOLX!!!!)

Ok ok ok. You win. What do you want?!?!

(.......)

Well.... never mind. I guess this kind of growing up stuff doesn't happen overnight just like that *snap fingers*. But well, i have to admit that i've a very exhibited childish/childlike (depends on how you look at it) nature, and i'd be like a lil bro to everyone. Perhaps it's just this dire want for someone to take care of me, perhaps. Well. That's the price you pay for having a semi-dysfunctional family where your parents don't communicate, and when you're the oldest child and your brothers are not exactly easy to handle. Whether i do blame them or myself, i leave it up to your own judgements.

All in all... even though if i had a chance, i'd like to relive certain parts of my life. But i guess ultimately, i give thanks for all that has happened in my life, and it forms a very unique part of my past 20 years given by god. Like it or not, it has helped me grow in one way or another. ;)

Well well. off to sleep i go...

Shannon left at 9:50 p. m..

martes, agosto 30, 2005

[ 994. COC ]

70 weeks ago, i saw the very same CO taking over the command symbol from TSB. And now, i see him handing it over to the next CO. Well, it's been a happening 70 weeks, and though i can't say that it's been smooth sailing most of the times, but i guess it's definitely goes down in my history as memorable. CO, through his stories, scoldings, naggings and such has been one of the most impactful personalities i've came across, definitely because of my days as his PA. But well, all good things has to come to an end.

Unfortunately (and fortunately), i wasn't involved much in this COC. Due to wallaby packing, my magazine project and some other ad-hoc matters, i was excused from most work in this COC. Which was well, giving me some sort of an ambivalence. I can't do much for him even for the last event for him as CO (and yes, i wasn't even on his farewell video), and yet, thankful that i've been spared of more loads on my back.

Ok ok, i didn't exactly do nothing for this COC at all. I filmed most parts of the video. Yeah, that's what i did mostly for the COC.

Anyway, here's some teasers for you guys.

more to come.

Shannon left at 11:28 p. m..

domingo, agosto 28, 2005

[ 993. Vocal Consort ]

After some persuasion from ms mok, i decided to join her in going to take a look at vocal consort's practice today. After some rushing (since i woke up at noon), i was like at jurong east interchange about an hour and a half later with huiyin and her friends.

I was telling her that i haven't sung for like ages, and you know her being her, she was like 'oh it's ok one! really!' and well well, you know the rest. But ok lar, it wasn't that bad after all. Pretty slack, from what i can see. But since it's only the first practice that i've seen, i shan't comment much first. Haha.

I'm still pretty tired after clubbing last night. Bleah. Thankfully we finished that bottle. And now i'm like wondering how am i going to pass my driving. (Yeah i know there's no link but basically what i'm trying to say now is that i can't exactly think coherently.)

And i got cos duty for the next two days. Argh.

Shannon left at 7:06 p. m..

sábado, agosto 27, 2005

[ 992. Saturday Morning ]

Hmm. Two girls in aussieland, two brothers in states. Another friend's on NW6 heading to pittsburgh just as i'm penning these words. It's a saturday morning, and mom just left for a routine check up at the hospital. Supposedly to meet merv for breakfast later, after taking a rain check on this afternoon's kbox session. Well, never mind. Signals' clubbing tonight at chinablack. And i'll have church till then.

Well well. Those are the routine information for today, if anyone's interested at all.

It's one week to my birthday, and another 8 posts for the grand thousand. It's been a good thirty months since i started the first entry, and surprisingly i still have the energy to go on writing, writing and bitching about everyday's affair. The blogging scene has changed much over these years, i mean, when i first blogged, there wasn't even such a thing as a 'blogging scene' until narcissistic creatures like ms wendy came along. 20 years has come and pass (in a week's time), but i guess it's maybe not a big deal after all. What lessons have i learnt over the first 20 years of my life? Perhaps it can be summarised as this: just barely enough to spend the next 50 years of my life. Frankly i think i haven't got much. I haven't knew much. The next ten years should be my defining years for the rest of my life. Cheers.

Back to breakfast soon. ;)

Shannon left at 8:56 a. m..

viernes, agosto 26, 2005

[ 991. Generals ]

Woooh. COC in 4 days. Hoo Hummmm.

Shannon left at 9:43 p. m..

miércoles, agosto 24, 2005

[ 990. Bookmaking ]

Spent the entire today literally making a book. Ok, maybe not the physical aspect, but more like generating the pages of this upcoming book that CO envisions. There's this entire collection of thai emperor stories that co has written, and he wants to publish it. So, our job as editors plus (former and current) PAs was to edit the entire version of the book, make it presentable then look for a publisher. The editing part was as usual tedious, but the sad part was the publishing house had a finish that didn't quite turn out to be what i expect it to be. So well, there goes more publisher hunting.

We went for strudels after that then. Muahahaha. It was fantastic, apart from the fact that i think the schoolgirls adjacent to us were pretty amused how come two army guys were whipping out their cameras and taking shots of strudels as if they never seen one in their life before. Hmmmm.

I took a stroll down bt timah road, much fancied by the scenery and some of the buildings and shops that i've never seen before. Of course, that has to be taken down by my trusty camera, which chose to run low on battery at that time. Well sharks. So i took the bus home.

Outside police academy, i saw a friend who happen to board my bus back. And so i found out that he was a police officer. Not our army officer equivalent, but rather what we called a 'specialist'. And we began our half-hour debate about which was better, the army or the police. And somewhat, he just went on selling about how dangerous police can get, and inevitably, i guess the message that he was trying to put across to me was that 'oh, policemen are really great people cuz they hail more power over citizens, they are rare to come by, their jobs are tougher than their military counterparts, they have a higher death toll in the line of duty, and therefore, it can be concluded that policemen are so much greater than our soldiers and i'm proud to be one.'

frankly, i don't give a damn. muahahahaha. it's only the newbie syndrome. It's gonna die off when you're in your second year of contract. =)

Shannon left at 8:05 p. m..

sábado, agosto 20, 2005

[ 989. Mervin's Bdae ]

Well well well, it's the THIRD time we're celebrating his birthday together. Hahaha, but regretfully, only three of us could make it this year. Laisan was down with dizzy spells, jasmine was out of action and hence leaving suping, shufen and myself to celebrate merv's bdae at the ever so familiar glass house fish and co. Even i had to be late due to service. Was pretty reluctant to leave early today, cuz it was ess. But well, i still left slightly before the end of service so as to rush down to meet the rest.

What's different this year was that, merv's paid the bulk of the meal. So in return, we treated him to waffles with ice-cream at gelare! Our traditional photo-taking session continued its glorious moments at the ice-cream porlour, where four crazy people shamelessly went trigger-happy. What more with two plates of waffles and ice-cream, they went even crazier to make sure that they get their seventeen dollars' worth.

Popped by mustafa with mervin to link up with his parents. He wanted to buy the seiko watch that he had eyed for a long time there, but to his dismay, it was out of stock. Even after running between the two mustafa buildings to check for stocks, we still couldn't find the one that merv had eyed. Eventually, we had to leave an order behind, which was supposed to come in two weeks later. Could see merv's slight disappointment, but that watch was really a looker.

Talking about mustafa. My first time there, i was pretty appalled by the variety of stuff they sell there. You name it, they've got it! Its like this giant hypermarket with everything you can possibly imagine. And well, the only thing is that, it's not exactly cheap either. No, they aren't expensive, but it's not the cheapest stuff you can exactly get on the market either, contrary to popular belief. But i guess the savings comes in terms of not having to travel to many places to get your stuff ya. And the money changing rate is cheap there too. Think i'll probably change my aussie dollars there. Rates running a low of A$1=S$1.268, cheaper than many other places where i saw A$1.28. Hmmmm.

Okies. gotta sleep soon. Meeting tom tomorrow. =)

Shannon left at 11:29 p. m..

[ 988. Gmail ]

After after after much procrastination, i finally got myself a gmail! Haha, with the help of mingxiu's gmail, i managed to get myself a couple of gmail accounts, one for my personal use and one for mr x productions. =) Oh yeah, and mr x productions just got its first customer, namely the saotsc. Muahahaha. Go ask mingxiu if u wanna know more.

Well well, think since it's 232 days to ord, and about a further 100 days to start of uni life, i better start saving up to do lots of things that i want to buy, i want to do and i have to do for uni. For example...

1) getting a laptop- a must have for someone like me who's stuck to the computer most of the time.
2) saving to visit derek in the states- need i say more?
3) new printer- since merv's moving his desktop to our bunk, i'm providing the printer.
4) changing my camera- just going on a spending spree
5) maybe getting an mp3 player...?
6) clothes, clothes and more clothes for uni life. Before that, getting a decent pair of shoes. Urgh.

Well............ so imagine how much will i need? Gee. Like lionel said, "i think you look like a spendthrift." Muahahahaha.

Shannon left at 10:45 a. m..

viernes, agosto 19, 2005

[ 987. Cards ]

Gee. i realized i haven't wrote cards to anyone for a very long time. Hmmmm.

Shannon left at 9:06 p. m..

jueves, agosto 18, 2005

[ 986. Chill Out ]

Yeah, last night after being cancelled out by my driving instructor, i had no choice but to chill out by myself. Especially after that entire brouhaha that occurred in the office that day, my spirits were dampened significantly. Many things i could do: go home, go run, go eat or sleep in bunk. After yet again some failed attempts to get a couple of friends out, i decided to head for woodlands, to the library for some reading time. alone.

Though i know it's pretty dangerous to head out alone, especially when your spirits are down, but i think i ought to get a hold on myself and just learn to listen to my own voice and take a break alone. Not seeking solace in others, but just to spend some time alone, doing something and just healing the soul. But alas, the book didn't hold me for long, and before even an hour was up, i headed back camp, remembering that project superstar finals was due for screening last night.

And oh my goodness. Never knew that... ah. never mind.

Oh yes, i ended up borrowing the book. =)

Shannon left at 5:05 p. m..

miércoles, agosto 17, 2005

[ 985. Picking Up ]

After a supposed week or two of being in the dumps, i thought that life is slowing picking up, despite being busy. But heck, each time i pick up speed, something just loves tripping me over emotionally.

"I spit at you, you big arsehole. I don't need no recognition from you anymore, and i don't give a damn where you may go. No more favours i need of you, no more help i'm giving you. You piece of shit."

Ok, i'm appeased. And i'll be heading back camp real soon.

Oh yes, let me speak in code again. I lost it. Lost it to someone else. It's now then i realized, no matter how much a girl says no, they still want to be treated like a princess at all times.

Shannon left at 8:00 p. m..

lunes, agosto 15, 2005

[ 984. Hanging Out ]

Been hanging out with people for the past couple of days, it's been some time since i did that.

Well, now that derek has been sent off, it's down to one more: tom. One after one, they all leave. Haiz.

Went out with merv to buy his birthday present. Kind of a co-sponsored thingy from us, he bought this pair of asics dx trainers. Well, surprisingly they were offering a 35% off the original 209 bucks, and he only paid 140. With the co-sponsoring from us, he end up paying oly 65 bucks for that pair. Wow!

Went to watch bewitched today with aaron and enghow. The show was pretty bad, cinematics was so-so, but the characters were pretty flat... somehow the concept of a show within a show didn't turn out well in that movie. Yeah. One of nicole kidman's worst pieces i guess.

And today's driving was totally disastrous. The classic example of stepping off the wrong foot: tried to engage gear without stepping on the clutch, then when gear engaged let go of the clutch immediately, then zhum the accelerator too hard and whatever la. Think i was too tired. Gee. Miraculously, the instructor didn't screw me.

Shannon left at 9:04 p. m..

sábado, agosto 13, 2005

[ 983. Busy Busy Day ]

Wheeeee. Just got home, and now i'm sitting at my bed, typing away on mom's lappie.

Finally had a semi-formal farewell event for our dear derek, who's leaving in say... 18 hours' time? For the record, this bro will be going over to usc to study music composition.

Was a mad rush today. Haha. Didn't remember to inform everyone, and with constantly changing plans, eng how and i were just next to pulling our hair out to get everyone together to host a farewell for derek. Haha. Nonetheless, think things flowed pretty naturally once the event kick started, of course, with the help of sheral and xinying who constantly provided the punch lines for endless guffaws by the whole lot of us. Regretfully, i didn't bring my camera, but at least i had sengkim who took a couple of photos as keepsake after der leaves tomorrow.

Well well, all's well when it ended well. So off i go, since i'm tired and i'm kind of lazy to go on typing...

(gee, as a soon-to-be cs student, i'm truly ashamed that i'm such a slacker when it comes to essays. GEE!)

Just a lil something from felix:

The word communication is derived from the Latin word "communis", which means "common".

In other words, communication can be thought of as the process of establishing a commonness, or oneness, of thought between the sender and the receivers. There must be a commonness of thought developed between sender and receivers if communication is to occur. Commonness of thought implies that a sharing relationship must exist between them.

Communication is something one does with another person, not to another person.

So well, do people mostly communicate, or simply talk?

Shannon left at 11:32 p. m..

miércoles, agosto 10, 2005

[ 982. One Thing Leads To Another ]

When you allow the ulo to see an uncensored* video.....

(*uncensored doesn't mean hum sup one. it only means that there are some things that should not be broadcasted to certain groups of people like those with crabs.)

the s3 has to walk in.

then zun zun* the part of someone mimicking s3 has to come on.

(*zun zun = just nice, exact timing)

then s3 laughed it off.

then s3 mentioned about the video to co.

then co asked to watch the video.

heng heng co laughed it off.

then next day hor, co saw a certain 3sg and told him, "eh you very naughty ah"

the day when everything went wrong man...

(PS: i feel like strangling the ulo now. MR CHIAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARGH!!!!)

Shannon left at 9:16 p. m..

[ 981. Festival of Praise ]

Yes, i did went down for the long-absent fop on sunday. After a couple of year's hiatus, they're finally back. I went down, with an ambivalence of expectancy and also reluctance. Somehow, i felt compelled to go down, but yet i just can't explain this fear.

Thankfully we reached there and started queueing at about slightly before 5, and thanks to gary who was to pick something up from me for bringing us our dinner. No one expected leisure park to have closed, and there goes our dinner.

Fop this year was no different from the previous times it was held: resident visitor hillsongs belting out their latest worship music, and delirious was here as well. Praise was led to a all time high, and i just had this sense of amazement, singing thousands of people simply dancing, singing and praising before the stage, before God. It's really encouraging, and i guess most people who saw the scene would have melted, would have felt god's warmth and fuzziness feeling their hearts. Be it a momentary emotion, or a truly thankful feeling, i was touched nonetheless. It's been a long time since i really enjoyed myself and immersed myself in a time of praise and worship. Forgetting all the things around me, and simply dancing, jumping, singing and thinking of God. It's been so long.

I remembered messaging jason just the night before, and somehow i'm somewhat disappointed he has yet to reply. Sent him a second message last night again, but well, to no avail as well. I really wonder what he's thinking. Haiz.

I have many regrets. rather, i guess i have commit enough mistakes to know that i can't turn back time, but all the same if i had a chance i would. Rash decisions has led to many stupid consequences. Consequences that made me sad, consequences that made me cry, consequences that made me totally frustrated and even wishing to kill myself at times. But i went through them all the same. Well, no more wishing that i haven't done those, but i'm just waiting for what the future has for me. What god has for me.

I realized i still absentmindedly key in her number each time i want to make a call.

Shannon left at 8:52 p. m..

martes, agosto 09, 2005

[ 980. Maid in Manhattan ]

"To serve people takes dignity and intelligence. Remember, there's only people with money, and we only serve them, we're not their servants. What we do does not define who we are, what defines us is how well we rise after falling."

Shannon left at 5:56 p. m..

[ 979. Overdue: Sentosa ]

Haha. i'm now officially shedding skin, due to the unforgiving sun that glared down on us while we're at tanjong beach on sunday... never went to a beach for a long time!

Shannon left at 11:36 a. m..

sábado, agosto 06, 2005

[ 978. Public Speaking ]

It's vcd marathon today... haha. caught maid in manhattan earlier from 12 to 2, followed by the lizzie macguire movie from 230 to 4. This two movies are strangely irrelevant to each other, but there's a common issue in both: the lack of confidence in public speaking. Chris marshal and tye has a problem in addressing crowds in their speeches, and lizzie just has this natural knack for screwing up in front of crowds, be it making disasters such as the collapse of the stage, or simply stuttering and forgetting your lines.

Which reminded me. I can't speak in front of crowds for nuts. Ok, i can deliver a message, but i realize i never possessed the charimsa to speak in front of crowds. Either i'll end up losing their attention, or i simply confuse them. Right... perhaps that's why i never liked the idea of public speaking, though ironically i talk a lot to friends and such. Still remembered when i was helping to run the show back in sec 4 vsco camp, half the time i forget what i wanted to tell the people and ended up repeating my announcements lots of times. Haha. Even in jc1, when i was pushed forward as a pre-u sem presenter, ms g pushed me so hard to practise till i almost broke down during one of the rehearsals. I had to pray so hard before each rehearsal for the rehearsal to push through smoothly and that i won't get screwed. But well, i almost forgotten my lines that day, for the record. But thanks to noraida, my partner-in-crime... everythin went smoothly. Yeah. Hahah. As far as i'm concerned, the only public speaking opportunity that i didn't screw up was the project work presentation. Haha, except that ten people wasn't much of a crowd. Hehs.

Well, guess as i enter cs next year, chances for public speaking will definitely increase. Be it during coursework, or in ccas or other opportunities... i betta buck up man. Darn these public speaking stuff.

Shannon left at 4:21 p. m..

[ 977. Moods ]

Ok, disclaimer, disclaimer: i'm not in a foul, bad, or moody mood. Yeah. But i sort of realized people around me are pretty down. Office politics (which i fortunately to escape this week), relationship issues and many more. Someone once said before, when festive season is about the corner, people tend to feel lonelier, moodier. I wonder if it's true 'cuz national day is coming up. Hmmmm. Shan't go into these issues. I will get melancholic. Definitely. ;)

Walked back from central to deposit a check and for breakfast. And i walked passed this vcd shop... and i made the mistake of stepping in. I came out with 3 rented vcds. Ouch. 6 bucks gone. Hahahaha. But it's three movies that i wanted to catch but didnt... The lizzie mcguire movie, maid in manhattan, and princess diaries two. ;)

And yes, i just can't wait to go to uni! Wheeee!!

Shannon left at 11:50 a. m..

viernes, agosto 05, 2005

[ 976. Trial ]

Well, actually i'm kind of attached out to another place for the whole of this week. Nevertheless, i found myself going back to unit everyday just to finish up work that i've left behind, and people insist that i finish by the end of the week. Price you pay for privileges you get. Baah.

Let's just say that the comms trial that i was involved in was pretty slack except for today. Yeah, cuz we had to pack all the stores. I tell you, i so hate packing stores, especially the accounting portion. Once during course was enough, especially when the whole platoon pressures you into quickly finishing the job so they could book out. But sometimes, things can't be compromised cuz stores equate to money. Well, thankfully today, losses were minimised. To cut the long story short, by the time i got back to unit, it was nine.

You know something freaky happened today. On my way home just now, i was thinking about two things that i hoped to see in my letterbox today: the refund cheque from canada, and my acceptance letter from ntu. I was like dreaming about it, though i was told it would come slightly later than this week. But freaky enough, the letters were right on my table when i got home! Hahahhaa...

I got my answers this week. As usual, things turned out the way as i predicted. It's me. My changes. I've changed ever since last year. And she couldn't accept that. It's time to move on, i guess.

Shannon left at 10:38 p. m..

martes, agosto 02, 2005

[ 975. Meeting People ]

(Gee, i forgotten to publish this post cuz my com DID crash during my typing. argh.)

As i'm typing this, i'm praying earnestly for the computer not to crash. It likes to play sudden shut downs.

Yesterday right after my little store-sending stint to 201 (right beside ntu), i received a surprising message from liwei asking me out. She asked me out! Wow!! On a monday night some more! This petite yet boyish little captain was finally liberated from the days of outfield and quizzes, and thought of... me. Remembering that i opened an offer for dinner anyday, anytime. In return, i rushed home from the darn western island to retrieve her dusty gift from my drawer before zipping down to toa payoh to receive her. A short dinner at mos burger was accompanied by an unfruitful search for her supposed card shop, which we highly suspect was taken over by the city chain store. I was sharing to her about how i drew these four plastic ten dollar notes from the atm, and how new they looked that i could help but to draw another forty dollars from another atm so that i could keep these four notes. It suddenly dawned upon me how himbotic i sounded. Well, never mind. With her it's ok. At least we compliment each other. Hahaha.

With my treat of a cheesecake with chocolate ice-cream at arts bistro, neatly hidden in vhive (just above toa payoh kfc), i got another message from ben yuan asking to meet. Well, talk about how come people only remember me at the beginning of a new month. Hmmm.

Again, made a mad rush to chong pang nasi lemak stall to have a little supper with ben. A plate of chee cheong fun, two drinks, and plenty of talk. He's been a really thoughtful guy i guess. I'm pretty surprised by the things he brought up. Things that i never expected him to remember. A pleasant surprise, though it was pretty awkward for me to talk about certain things. Ok, not exactly awkward but wasn't in the mood to talk about those stuff. Found out from him that he has signed the MOE bond to teach geography. But well, he reasoned that he only needed like half a year's work in uni to teach the necessary subjects in geography secondary school syllabus. Haha. ok, that's one way to look at it, but well, there's always more to learn.

Think it's been a really good time catching up with these people... so well, call me out some day people!

Shannon left at 9:39 p. m..

gone. will i be back? i don't know. maybe i've started elsewhere. maybe never. again.