my.escape

gone.

will i be back?
i don't know.
maybe i've started elsewhere.
maybe never. again.

domingo, mayo 21, 2006

[ 1189. Mj ]

After a one week break, i'm back to the mahjong table. But some things that happened over last evening kept my thoughts off the game. Never mind that i won a milkshake's worth of money, but somehow there's no reason to smile. I guess, it just hurts to see a friend hurting so badly. And there's nothing much you can do about it, except to offer pointless words of encouragement and concern. Sometimes, you'll really hope to run up, punch the guy, and hope that things will turn better finally. But heck, such things will never happen. This is life.

And there's her. I find myself looking for her nick to appear on my msn list every evening. And each time my phone vibrates, i hoped it was her. It's just... i dunno. I'm letting myself feel too much, i guess.

stop it.

Let's return to reality. it's impossible. i need to distance myself. emotionally. she has got someone else in mind. and down that list, probably i'm nowhere near the top. maybe weiwei's right. maybe i've gotten too close for comfort. for anything to be actually possible apart from just being friends.

xuan. move on. the one in her heart's not you.

(jx.iknowitsimpossiblebetweenusbutijustwannaknowhowyoufeel.)

Shannon left at 6:41 p. m..

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the guy

xuan shannon male single 030985.
ntu cs year1 / vocalconsort tenor2 / hopesg nyc ntub1.
msn me.

his wishes

new clothes, new shoes, new bike, new friends, fantastic grades. ~~macbook, ipod nano, nokia n80, new wallet.~~

his horizons

malaysia, penang. australia, brisbane/gold coast. thailand, hatyai. malaysia, genting. malaysia, johor. malaysia, melaka. thailand, chiangmai. australia, perth. canada, edmonton/cold lake. australia, rockhampton. thailand, bangkok. austria, vienna. czech rep, olomouc. austria, salzburg. germany, munich. switzerland, zurich.

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gone. will i be back? i don't know. maybe i've started elsewhere. maybe never. again.