my.escape

gone.

will i be back?
i don't know.
maybe i've started elsewhere.
maybe never. again.

domingo, mayo 07, 2006

[ 1172. Church ]

Naughtily exchanging sms with a certain someone throughout my tuition session, there's a tinge of guilt, but yet a sense of amusement arose as well. At least it helped me last through long sessions of tuition. I don't usually mind long hours of tuition, after all, i used to study from dawn to dusk three years back. I've gotta admit, i'm not that young anymore. As each day pass, i feel like i'm losing a lil energy. Signs of aging. Hahas.

I like strolls. Walking around aimlessly, especially with people i like and i love, chatting idly, indulging in mindless talks. I love to stroll alone too. That walk from my student's place to the mrt was therapeutic. Enjoying the fresh air of that mini-garden, looking at the faces of those little kids that happily scamper pass me, noting the faces of those people who obviously just stepped out of the nearby polling center, wondering if they have made the right vote.

Stepped into the orchard area, after a hiatus of many week. The feeling of homecoming came once again. Warm, yet awkward. As i screened through the entire cuppage s11 for my cell group, i fear seeing people that i know. I don't like people asking me, "hey why haven't i see you for a long time". I know they care, or probably they are asking out of courtesy, but it'll simply make me feel bad. I hate that kind of feeling. There are always faces that i'll always look forward to see. Bowen. Chris. Enghow. Mx. Joseph. Jonathan. Aaron. and so to name a few. Alas, none of them are from my cell, sadly.

Worship was energising. The god-factor came in once again, making me looking back at the past few weeks, at the presence of god in my life. It never fails to happen during each worship, making me empowered, yet sinking in further in guilt and sometimes regret. But somehow the skeptic in me knows that i won't be disciplined enough to want to do the right thing. the godly thing. And i don't tell that to many people cuz i know they'll be disappointed. I seriously wonder how long will i take to grow up and realize what's good for me.

Had a short dinner session with the cg at s11, before we parted our ways for coffee and home. I received a very nice copy of the cg covenant, printed on a card and painted by huiyin:

And i've gotten a card and a big smiley face keychain from weiwei also, who will be moving on to the adults group wef this week. She's really a sweet girl, though quiet and petite. Somehow reminds me of junting, the motherly streak in her will always make her ask if i'm ok, message me to inform me abt evens and so on and so forth. =)

Consort later. I've gtg. Ciaoz.

Shannon left at 10:19 a. m..

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the guy

xuan shannon male single 030985.
ntu cs year1 / vocalconsort tenor2 / hopesg nyc ntub1.
msn me.

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new clothes, new shoes, new bike, new friends, fantastic grades. ~~macbook, ipod nano, nokia n80, new wallet.~~

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malaysia, penang. australia, brisbane/gold coast. thailand, hatyai. malaysia, genting. malaysia, johor. malaysia, melaka. thailand, chiangmai. australia, perth. canada, edmonton/cold lake. australia, rockhampton. thailand, bangkok. austria, vienna. czech rep, olomouc. austria, salzburg. germany, munich. switzerland, zurich.

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gone. will i be back? i don't know. maybe i've started elsewhere. maybe never. again.